Yesterday, I reached out to a candidate local to our office, open for work on LinkedIn, regarding an opening we had. She was obsessed with one line she did not like in the job description and made it clear that a specific task was beneath her. It is something all of us do at the office—take incoming calls. It only took a short interaction to determine she was not a cultural fit and in line with our Core Values. She did not even ask a question to clarify whether ‘answering calls” meant 1–2 calls a day or 100 calls a day. Her exact comment was, “I don’t think answering calls would be utilizing my skills.” She obviously did not to read the two-page position description explaining that answering calls was minimal at best.

Developing Confidence in Construction Management

Earlier that morning, Paul Martinelli’s thought for the day was, “If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.” Many in our workforce struggle with self-confidence and insecurity. We all, at times, struggle with self-assurance if we listen to the wrong voices in our heads. Confidence comes from assuring oneself that you are fearfully and wonderfully made for a purpose and that you have someone you can trust fighting for you right by your side. A group study I recently completed focused on Louis Giglio’s book Don’t Give the Enemy a Seat at Your Table. It’s about winning the battle in your mind. Several of our study group members spoke on how the visual from the book has helped them put prospective to their challenges.

If you follow our page and read my blogs and books, you know my repeated comment is, “Skill can be taught, attitude and aptitude cannot.” Recently, at my office, we had an incident where it was thought that the goals set were not achievable. I had to agree with them if they were going to keep that attitude and spill it out onto others. An attitude shift not only demonstrated it was possible but in half the time. James Allen first published a book in 1908 called As a Man Thinketh. It starts out speaking about Thought and Character and begins with “The aphorism, ‘As a man thinketh in his heart so is he,’ not only embraces the whole of a man’s being but is so comprehensive as to reach out to every condition and circumstance of his life. A man is literally what he thinks, his character being the complete sum of his thoughts.

As the plant springs from, and could not be without, the seed, so every act of a man springs from the hidden seeds of thought and could not have appeared without them. This applies equally to those acts called ‘spontaneous’ and ‘unpremeditated’ as to those which are deliberately executed.”

Attitude in the workplace is recognized daily through one’s communication, action, and expressions. Here are a few examples.

Impact of Attitude on Construction Project Success

Buy-In: Lack of buy-in is demonstrated when one is asked to do something once, regularly, or in a certain way by their supervisor, and they choose not to do so, requiring it to be asked again or assigned to someone else. Either instance, over time, will result in the employee’s downfall because that employee chooses to overlook the ask (attitude or aptitude) instead of communicating for understanding and buy-in. It is even worse if one proceeds beyond listening to and verbally agreeing to adhere to a request but then continues to not do so.

If you disagree with your supervisor’s request, ask questions to understand, such as, “Why would you like me to do this? Will this be ongoing or just until you develop an understanding of how it is handled?” You can also provide alternative solutions that may benefit all participants with the same result. I assure you that few supervisors would ask you to do something that does not have a purpose behind it, even if that purpose is to check your attitude or understand how you process and think. This is especially true in a new hire relationship.

Importance of Body Language in Construction Management

Body Language: American Express published an article in 2016 called “25 Body Language Mistakes You May Be Making”. Some of these expressions include avoiding eye contact, rolling your eyes, watching the clock, and even getting too close or stepping back. Most of us who work in the construction industry are by nature or training “visual” and “perceptive.” I remember when I first heard the expression “resting bi*ch face,” and, yes, it was from my middle schoolers at the time, and, thankfully, it was not about me. It was referring to people who naturally scowl. The American Express article states that if this is a natural expression of yours, then communicate this to those you do not know as it can be off-putting.

The article includes a follow-up article with tips on how to project confidence through your body language with seven specific tips. The tip on how to embrace power poses includes a prelude on how to fight self-doubt, which is excellent. Learning how to recognize what you portray with your body language and making necessary corrections will benefit your career success more than you can ever know. After all, what employer or supervisor wants to deal with immaturity?

Dealing with Workplace Gossip in Construction Projects

Commentary: Galen Emanuele, improv performer and business coach, is a great resource for simple training videos to boost your career success. His video and blog on “How To Shut Down Toxic Talk, Gossip, & Bullsh*t” speaks to a healthy culture having a no-tolerance attitude towards gossip. He states (and I agree), “Gossip, rumors, and badmouthing others is a bad look for you. It destroys your reputation, is toxic to culture, and it’s cruel, shi**y behavior. Don’t do it.” All too often and in my own workplace, we have had those who love to talk about things that have no purpose other than to eat, kill, and destroy in the workplace. Career coaches such as me call these individuals “cancer in the workplace,” and most of us employers know we sometimes keep them too long. It is usually those who are likable and personable yet do not own their responsibilities or provide solutions; they excel at talking us into second, third, and fourth chances.

A good mantra to repeat is, “Does it need to be said? Does it need to be said by me? Does it need to be said by me right now?” The average person speaks around 16,000 words per day, and yes, females are known to be in the higher range. Yet in the majority-male construction industry (and many of the women in construction management earning their rank with excellent soft skills can tell you), we have many men who talk too much and love to gossip and bad mouth. Male or female, we usually see their resumes come in predictably every 1–2 years as they continually find themselves looking for work again.

Improving Soft Skills in the Construction Industry

In my book Happily Married to Your Employer, chapter 5, “What is Your Behavior?”, I speak to hard and soft skills in the workplace and comment that “The hard fact about soft skills is that without them, you may be the next one looking for a job.” All too often, construction managers think their value is in their constructability knowledge. While invaluable, the knowledge of building is not invaluable by itself without the soft skills to accompany working with others for success in the overall development and construction management process and projects.

I assure you that a comment stating that something is not the best use of your skills instead of learning to ask a question back to clarify, such as “How much of my day would be allocated to taking incoming calls?” could be the difference between landing your dream job, keeping your dream job, and getting fired. After all, we all know never to ASSUME as it makes an AS* out of U and ME. Controlling emotions, choosing words wisely, and asking questions for clarity, understanding, and buy-in will help you open doors you never thought possible.

You are never too big or too small to make a difference. You can be the right size when you rightly size things up.

To Your Professional Reactions,

Suzanne Breistol